Dear Chick on the Q Train,
I'm a tad confused. You went out of the house today all dolled up in a nice summer dress and a brand new pair of boots. You had your makeup all done up, your hair was perfectly highlighted. It was clear that you even had your impeccable eyebrows freshly waxed (base on the redness all around your browline). So why on Earth did it look like you haven't shaved your legs in at least a year? What. The Shit. Is That About? Listen, shaving sucks to your assmar. There's nothing enjoyable about dragging a razorblade across your skin to scrape the hair off. But leg hair on a female just isn't ok. Unless you're a fucking centaur. Or you're part yeti. Come on, even your arm hair looked like it was shaved off. I just don't get it. It's like you're skipping all the easy test questions and going right to the extra credit. Please just help me to understand.
Guys who appreciate basic grooming